Twitter Epiphanies, Treadmill PR, and A Wondrous Giveaway Of Something You Actually Want

One week check-in after using Twitter.

So far I 76% hate it.  It is a massive time waster and feels much more commercial and urgent than Facebook.  I'm on team Facebook.  Nevertheless, Twitter has made me realize the following things:
  • I am the kind of person who thinks I have a good sense of humor because I laugh at funny things, but it turns out, I am not witty in 140 characters or less.  In other words, I am good at reading tweets.  I am not good at writing them.
  • Hashtags, as I always suspected, are nothings.  They are nothings! They are just back-end titles for a sentence.  
  • Nobody works? I know Facebook already taught me this lesson.  But I cannot wrap my mind around HOW people are able to document their random thoughts throughout the day.  A day documenting my "random thoughts" would look like this:
    • 10:18 a.m.: shit, I really gotta finish this motion draft by 1:00.
    • 12:30 p.m.: ugh.  A nastygram from opposing counsel.  Must resist urge to write irrational bitchy response. 
    • 2:30 p.m.: Sweet release, check the internet while I pee.
    • 4:00 p.m.: fuuuuuck, it's already four!?  
    • 4:45 p.m.: If I were to write something funny on twitter right now, maybe I would say--oh hi, yes, let's talk about that opposition brief.
    • 6:30 p.m.: I'm hungry.  My work now has diminishing returns.
    • 7:30 p.m.: somehow this popcorn is making me hungrier?  I have to go.  I swear I'll come in early tomorrow to finish this up.
    • Next morning: running is way better than getting to work early.  run run run run run. 
  • So I've clearly got to work on being more interesting during the day.  Insert some observational humor about how big a MORON that Starbucks barrista was for writing my name on the cup as Katelyn instead of Caitlin.  what an idiot, amiright? 
  • Why are Instagram posts on Twitter? Why are twitter posts on Facebook? Why so much overlap? Do you see the duplication here folks? In the world where I am in charge, it would only be blogs. More than 140 characters is nice.  We can get to know each other this way.
  • Taylor Swift loses her virginity on video like, twice a day.  #twitterspam. 


This was exciting for me! I've been rocking my 9.39 miles in one hour "record" since Feb 2012, and honestly that sounded insanely fast and I didn't think I would ever beat it.

This beautiful morn, I ran 9.50 perfect little miles on the treadmill in one hour.  1.0 incline of courrrrse. Average 6:18 pace?

The huge caveat, of course, is that I cannot run on a treadmill for an hour without stopping to mop up my sweaty face and chug some water, but I can still measure my progress against my old "record" because I also had to step off the belt for a few seconds for my old "record".  

I would guesstimate that I stepped off the belt for 10-20 seconds four times?  So we can consider this 4 tempo repeats with a 15 second recovery. 

The run was a reverse progression run--I started at 9.8 mph (6:07 pace) and worked down 0.1 mph every 10-ish minutes, finishing at 9.2 mph.  It was hard, but manageable.  I could feel one of my hamstrings getting tired near the end, but that's my only bad memory from the run. 

(I honestly don't know how anyone could run for one hour on a treadmill without stopping.  Even if I'm running slow on a treadmill I have to step off for a few seconds after 30-40 minutes due to thirst.  I guess I could buy a sip-top water bottle...)

hahahahahahahahaha to infinity.....

I took this photo because I wanted to talk about my new shoes and bright pink shorts.  I will do that in a later post.  As for now, I just have to point out that this makes my legs look about 3000% longer and leaner than they actually are.  And in turn, I have just discovered why so many internet nerds post these disgusting pictures of their legs taken from this vantage point.  Seriously, these pics gross me out.  This picture of MY legs grosses me out.  Especially because it is a massive misrepresentation.  My legs do NOT look like this.

Anyway. Me and the treadmill have buddied up for a few other tough runs.

We also met last Saturday morning.  I would never choose to run on the TM on a Saturday.  Saturdays are my "run long and forever up and over the hills and wherever I want to explore" day.

Last Saturday, I needed to work, and I needed to get to work early-ish, and I NEED to catch up on sleep on weekends.  I also didn't want to give up my Saturday long run.  So I had to figure out a way to get in my desired long run, while waking up at 7:00.

Solution: treadmilllll.  20 miles in the open wild takes me 3 hours, not including time chilling at the water fountain chewing on whatever sugar I brought with me.  20 miles on the treadmill takes me less than 2.5 hours.

So 20 miles in 2:23 it was, bouncing around between 8.0 and 8.8 paces, plenty of drink breaks, so we can call it 19.7 miles.

As for the other details of my running routine....I haven't gone for a swim in at least two weeks.  As soon as it got really hot out, I FEARED THE PEOPLE that would start to emerge at the gym pool to get their tan on.  So I've been avoiding it....which is weird...since I always hated swimming in the 30 degree air.  But I simply haven't wanted to swim.

I have been rolling my butt on a tennis ball, still need to order a medicine ball since the tennis ball has some give (thanks for the tips) but I do think it's helping my leg lock a little! I mean CUMMON.  There's no fucking way I could run 9.5 miles in one hour on a treadmill with a serious injury.  I seem to be doing okay? Can never tell if I'm feeling whole or just getting better at managing pain....

And in blog moderating stuff, I just want to say sorry that I haven't replied to any comments in a while. I never intend to do that, but sometimes 3 days goes by and I just don't make it up in here, and then it seems too late.  If I've ever accidentally skipped a question or solid advice, please repeat it and I will try to give it the time it deserves.


Shit just got real for you!

I'm so excited to tell you.  That you're gonna get some PRO-COMPRESSION! ####what!?

No you're not.  You're getting....


nah.  You're getting THE CHANCE TO WIN A BOOK SIGNED BY ME!! I didn't write the book though.  Just signed it.

Signed by this cool slurpee friend
Okay really, this silly lead up is to remind you that many giveaways belong hidden in a mud hut, but this is the best kind, the kind I want, the kind I want to GIVE you, cause it's FREE RACE REGISTRATION BITCHES!



Here's the schedule of races that you can choose from if you win:

Each race offers a half marathon and a 5k.  See here for more info about the race and the goodies that come with it.

**See Jane Run races are "women's" races, but men can sign up and run, and can win this giveaway.  Both years I've run the half, I've seen a male racer up near the front with me.  Your time will be counted but the finisher prizes are for women only.**

The half registration is $85, so be a stud and win! And then run the half!

If you want to enter, mention SJR in the comments; if you aren't interested, comment and DON'T mention SJR obvi, stupid.

Would love to see some of you in Alameda in June!  Since the races are approaching soon, I will try to shut this giveaway down and announce the 3 winners next Monday evening/Tuesday morn.  Good luck!